In the second installment of this tale of digital debauchery our hapless rube finds he needs info like a junkie needs junk… Will he fight the temptation of the mobile monkey? Find out in…
CONFESSIONS OF A CRACKBERRY FIEND
Part Two: Anger
My first stop was the Rogers kiosk in the local mall, still could not shake the dirty feeling but I was determined to have some form of link to the outside world besides filth encrusted payphones. When I found the joint all the handsets where under glass like expensive watches or some other fancy bauble and I had to ask the clerk to show me the ones that looked really shiny. I felt like I was trying to choose an engagement ring for a relationship I desperately wanted out of. The units were ridiculously overpriced and the plans for internet and email usage were extravagantly priced with no good student plans or even a decent unlimited plan. Granted all my info was coming from a blurry and dog-eared photocopy of the actual brochure. After the clerk informed me that they only had the one copy and went off to flirt with a pair of teenage girls looking at handsets under glass. The second stage came on quickly, anger, pure venom and bile, I dropped the handset on the counter and walked away.
Editor’s note: The boys in the lab have managed to recover another memo, unfortunately it took several weeks as no-one could push any of the right buttons due to atrophied fingers. The entire staff is now undergoing intense physiotherapy and electro shock treatment for acute withdrawal symptoms:
“Crapspackle”
What strange turn has my path taken, it's the things you least expect that offer the greatest shock but promise the greatest rewards.
Well so much for promise, can't even view news videos much less waste time watching cartoons, ye gods what is the point of owning one of these horrid things if you can't get some kind of online video news summary????
Sent on the TELUS Mobility network with BlackBerry
Can this story really continue for three more installments? You read it you can’t UN-READ it!!!!
2 comments:
This was actually quite amusing to read. It is understandable that most of society have become dependent on another device that we truly can go without.
I tried a cell phone, as well, but I came to the sudden realization that I really don't need one. Thereafter finding out the convenience of it since I rarely have the change to use a payphone. hunting down another phone shouldn't be hard, I guess I'll just need to find one that suits me other than what is most convenient.
'Convenience', or lack there of.
Useless fact of the day:
I didn't have a cellphone until I was 19, even though I grew up in an era where most people are solely dependent on their cellphones.
Admittedly, I fell for that trap. Although I like the idea of text messaging because I have some serious issues with talking on the phone, it's not really worth the hassle.
I use Pay As You Go, which was foolish, considering I used up a $50 card in one night. When I first got the blasted thing, it took ages to activate. I went to Wal-Mart, who sent me Telus, who sent me back to Wal-Mart. It was a long, unpleasant process and not something I'd look forward to doing again.
With that all said and done, my cellphone is currently sitting at the bottom of my purse and hasn't been recharged in a few weeks. At least. Sure, I can understand the necessity of having one for emergencies, but it's a pretty ridiculous ordeal to go through.
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