The third installment of our electrifying tale of battery powered misadventure has our clueless protagonist ready to make a deal with the “Debell” herself, read all about it in...
CONFESSIONS OF A CRACKBERRY FIEND
Part Three: Bargaining
The air in the mall was giving me a headache, or maybe it was the simmering rage from my encounter with the slack-jawed hormone at the Rogers kiosk. I parked myself on an uncomfortable bench and began to ponder just how I would cope with the situation I found myself in; the bargaining had started. “I can always use the labs and computers at the college,” I thought “yeah that’ll be cheaper and I will get more work done, yeah,” but then I realized that I would not be able to work before going to school. There was no way out, I could not keep up on world events or even keep in touch with my family without some form of communication and I needed it NOW! “It’ll be weeks before I can get a landline and internet hook up so why wait when I can get a portable facsimile of both?” I knew from experience that Fido was a dogs breakfast when it came to service and coverage and having just eliminated Rogers I was at a loss at to who I could go to.
The question rattled around my brain and I knew the obvious answer that was before me but I did not want to even consider it; Bell. After all I had been through with Ma’bell I had sworn to never give her any of my business or another cent of my money and now I was contemplating crawling back to the most unholy telecommunications company in the universe. My yen for data and contact was overriding my better judgment and I was ready to sell my soul (for three years at least) to the devil, er debell, just so I could get brain cancer from a little plastic toy. There were no more options it was this or continue living like*gasp* people did before the internet.
It was all over and it had come to the very thing I had hoped and prayed to avoid. All that was left was to go and hand over my money and sign over my life to my own personal Mephistopheles.
Editor’s note: The rehabilitation of the lab staff has been completed with only a 75% mortality rate, so after replacing lost staff with several trained Mandrills we have managed to retrieve yet another digital nugget for you lucky readers, enjoy!
“Stuck inside of Tara with the mobile blues again?”
Well the visit home has been most enlightening, in a variety of ways. The end result of it all... Technology offers a crutch to the multitude of able bodied, albeit lazy, people (read CONSUMER) and they suddenly view their everyday commonplace tasks as handicaps. Well not me, I'm getting a Goddammed pen and paper!!!!!!!
Sent on the TELUS Mobility network with BlackBerry
Nov 22, 2008
Nov 13, 2008
We interrupt the irregularly scheduled cellular saga for a far less interesting and painfully longwinded public service announcement.
Now for the majority of people November means the onset of the fall and bitter temperatures and lots of raking and yard-work. For me it means dealing with unresolved issues and emotions that I tend to keep in check most of the year but end up bubbling to the surface sooner or later. With Veterans weeks and Remembrance day I have to come to grips with my own service in the military and where it could have taken me and where it is taking several of our young men and women.
Every time I see another story about a Canadian soldier being killed or “seriously injured” (which is a polite way to say they have lost limbs or other extremities) I wonder if that could have been me had I stayed in the military or I wonder if I knew the face or the name of the soldier. Before anyone gets ahead of themselves and says I am un-Canadian or subversive let me say I unequivocally support our troops, that said I think we have lost our way militarily. We are engaging in fierce and bloody combat operations when we should be focusing on rebuilding a country and keeping the peace. I could go on at length and no doubt provoke several comments on my opinion but I will focus on an idea that I have heard.
On Friday I traveled to Ottawa to attend the 1914-1918 vigil and pay my respects to the 68142 Canadian men and women who where killed in the First World War. While there I was told Remembrance can be about asking questions of our current choices, and it occurred to me that these selfless individuals who decided they needed to go to war went to protect my right to stand up and say loudly “Now wait just a minute, this is wrong.” Yeah sure, the right to complain the right to scratch at the big ugly machine you may say but in some countries doing that will put you in a world of pain and the fact is we do have it pretty good here for all the bellyaching that goes on.
Are our valiant troops fighting and dying in the wilds and cities of Afghanistan to keep the Taliban and Al Qeada from bringing terror and Sharia law to our doorstep? Possible but rather unlikely. Are they bogged down in the quagmire left by the unchecked aggression and military power of the United States? That’s possible too but the fact is there are a bunch Canadians who are highly trained and tough as nails fighting because that is there job, a job they volunteered for. We should support these citizens of Canada and not forget them we should make choices politically and socially to see that they get the support they need and to get them home as soon as possible.
I think what I am trying to say, and I do apologize for the disjointed and rambling nature of my entry which I blame on lack of sleep and emotions, is that our soldiers were, have been and continue to be the most dedicated and professional in the world and we should not just be proud of them we should be honoured to have had and continue to have such fine men and women willing to put their lives on the line for you and me.
Now for the majority of people November means the onset of the fall and bitter temperatures and lots of raking and yard-work. For me it means dealing with unresolved issues and emotions that I tend to keep in check most of the year but end up bubbling to the surface sooner or later. With Veterans weeks and Remembrance day I have to come to grips with my own service in the military and where it could have taken me and where it is taking several of our young men and women.
Every time I see another story about a Canadian soldier being killed or “seriously injured” (which is a polite way to say they have lost limbs or other extremities) I wonder if that could have been me had I stayed in the military or I wonder if I knew the face or the name of the soldier. Before anyone gets ahead of themselves and says I am un-Canadian or subversive let me say I unequivocally support our troops, that said I think we have lost our way militarily. We are engaging in fierce and bloody combat operations when we should be focusing on rebuilding a country and keeping the peace. I could go on at length and no doubt provoke several comments on my opinion but I will focus on an idea that I have heard.
On Friday I traveled to Ottawa to attend the 1914-1918 vigil and pay my respects to the 68142 Canadian men and women who where killed in the First World War. While there I was told Remembrance can be about asking questions of our current choices, and it occurred to me that these selfless individuals who decided they needed to go to war went to protect my right to stand up and say loudly “Now wait just a minute, this is wrong.” Yeah sure, the right to complain the right to scratch at the big ugly machine you may say but in some countries doing that will put you in a world of pain and the fact is we do have it pretty good here for all the bellyaching that goes on.
Are our valiant troops fighting and dying in the wilds and cities of Afghanistan to keep the Taliban and Al Qeada from bringing terror and Sharia law to our doorstep? Possible but rather unlikely. Are they bogged down in the quagmire left by the unchecked aggression and military power of the United States? That’s possible too but the fact is there are a bunch Canadians who are highly trained and tough as nails fighting because that is there job, a job they volunteered for. We should support these citizens of Canada and not forget them we should make choices politically and socially to see that they get the support they need and to get them home as soon as possible.
I think what I am trying to say, and I do apologize for the disjointed and rambling nature of my entry which I blame on lack of sleep and emotions, is that our soldiers were, have been and continue to be the most dedicated and professional in the world and we should not just be proud of them we should be honoured to have had and continue to have such fine men and women willing to put their lives on the line for you and me.
-LEST WE FORGET OUR GLORIOUS DEAD-
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